Ooooops!”
Actually, I spit out a shorter, one-syllable word as I took a stupid, scary tumble…one of the worst I’ve had in 40 years of living with MS. But this is a family column.
My last scary tumble, a few years ago, happened from a sitting position, and I fell onto the carpet. This one happened while I was standing, and I tumbled onto the concrete floor of the parking garage at my apartment house. I’m OK, but I don’t know how. I was being just plain stupid.
The other day, I’d repaired some wiring on the lightweight scooter I keep in the back of my SUV. A few days later, I was heading to a haircut appointment and thought I’d check out the scooter to be certain that everything was OK before leaving for the mall.
I took my little TravelScoot out of the SUV’s cargo area, but left the seat behind, thinking I didn’t need to sit on it to test it. I’d just twist the motorcycle-like throttle on the handlebar and make sure the scooter moved. It did move, but then I thought I’d give it another twist just to play it safe.
To quote Julia Roberts in the movie “Pretty Woman,” “Big mistake. Big. Huge!”
Down to the pavement I tumble
I gave the throttle too much of a twist, and the scooter scooted. So did I. Before I knew it, the scooter had yanked away, and down I went — hard — onto my right side.
How nothing was broken I don’t know. The only damage was a very minor scrape to my hand and the bruising of my pride. Good thing nobody was around to see me flounder. Also, bad thing nobody was around, as I had to get up without having anything to grab onto.
My two canes were leaning against the SUV, which was about 2 yards away. My aluminum scooter was closer, but it’s too light to use as support. Somehow, I slowly managed to get onto my hands and knees. I don’t remember how, but I was able to move to the rear of the car, probably by crawling, and then I used the bumper to yank myself up.
I know about falling. I know how to fall and how to limit the damage if I do. But this time, I thought I was a goner. In those few seconds of free falling, I had flashes of an ambulance and a trip to the hospital. But down on the ground, when I checked out my body, I was amazed to discover that all of the parts were in place, and a call to 911 wouldn’t be necessary.
I’m stupid, lazy, and lucky. Somebody up there must be watching over me.
Just when you think it can’t get worse
That’s not the end of the story, though. After putting away the scooter and getting into the SUV, I turned the key.
“Click, click, click, click.”
A dead battery!
There would be no haircut that day. That would come later, along with a jump-start and the idea for this column.
(A version of this post first appeared as my column on the MS News Today website.)
(Featured image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay.)
